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The perks of being unhitched

Ivana Pelisek | Interrobang | Opinion | October 27th, 2008

Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
For decades society has deemed it ‘right' and ‘proper' to be either engaged or married by a certain age.

Am I wrong here?

How many women assume that if they are not married by I don't know, let's say age 30, there must be something wrong with them. They must be man haters. Or they must certainly have something inadequate about them. Or perhaps they were at a point in their lives hurt by a man and are now done with men forever. This is not only inaccurate, but also over-rated by the very people who make such assumptions, but a blow to securing positive self-esteem.

Being attached may have its perks. Having one person in your life who loves and adores you may work for some people, but there are people who choose a different path simply because they want to.

Should these individuals be frowned upon by society just because they choose to wait until the ‘right' person comes along?

There is no predicting just exactly when we will meet ‘the one'. That's the beauty of it all if you think about it. Wouldn't you rather meet the right person when it's least expected and not just because you feel you have to?

Today's men and women differ, as do their perceptions about love, life and family.

Today's 20-something-year-olds have alternative motives when it comes to just whom they may wish to settle down and have a family one-day with. It is a different generation we are living in than our parents.

Have you ever wondered to yourself without the (possibility of having someone hear and judge you) exactly why you are un-attached?

If that's the case, you need to re-evaluate why you choose to be single and not tied up in a relationship just because others tell you it's the right thing to do.

Reason one: You are an independent woman who is in charge of her life. Whether it is financially, or morally you are in charge of your own destiny. You can fail but get up again and learn from your mistakes, which in turn make you a stronger individual. This is a great time in your life to do things solo and be proud of YOUR accomplishments.

Reason two: When it comes to me time, you are the one who is in full control over what you want to do. Whether you want to go out and enjoy a $9 coffee at some hot spot café or prance around in your birthday suit all day long. The sky is the limit and there is no one there saying you can't. Unless you prefer to make every Monday night, football night! That can be a thing in your past with your newfound appreciation for you.

Reason three: Say ‘yes' to girls' nights; every night! Host your own all-girls get together or get all dollied up and make it a night out on the town.

Reason four: You know that big, comfy bed you own. Well consider it all yours when you're ready to pack it in after a long hard day. No longer do you have to fight over the sheets or listen to someone snoring because they can't be bothered to sleep on their side.

Reason five: It's all about you, all of the time. This one is very self-explanatory. You do what you want, when you want and no one has the right to interfere or question you about your whereabouts.

Reason six: In-laws. Yes, I'm sure at one point it was awesome to always have someone interested in your life and wanting to know all the juicy details about your relationship. But let's face it, after a while the nosiness becomes apparent and all you want to do is scream and get out of letting everyone know all the details of your personal life. Besides, who needs another set of parents intrigued with your life? Your own set of parents does the job just fine.

Reason seven: Birthdays. Yes, there will not have to be anymore “I hope he remembers my birthday?” or “I wonder what he bought me for Valentine's Day?” I am sure most of us have wondered these same questions a time or two, but you no longer have to give yourself reasons as to why he failed to act like a big boy and didn't bother to call.

Reason eight: Having around the clock peace of mind. No longer will you have to wonder, “I wonder what he meant when he said that thing in that tone?” You no longer have to de-code his behaviour and just simply be happy with yourself.

Reason nine: If you cause a mess in your space, it's your mess. Picking up after your man sure does get tiring after a while and the last thing you want is to sound like their mother constantly nagging at them to clean up their shit.

Reason ten: Shoes. Clothes. More Shoes. Yes, most females love a great unique shoe collection without questions asked. So what if you own more pairs than anyone they've ever met. And who's business is it really that you own more dresses than you have time to wear them. Your business and yours only.

The truth is, everyone is ready to commit at various stages in their lives. For some, marriage comes at an early age, while others put different aspects of their life first such as profession or figuring out who you are as an individual.
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