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Faith Meets Life: Five Trillion Dolars

Vichael Meenama | Interrobang | Opinion | October 26th, 2009

Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
I have came into a lot of money and I can reward you in a big way if you will help me get it into the right hand. This is not one of those scams you get by emailed every week. Do not respond to any of those!

The method I am sharing with you is approved by the U.N., NATO, the CIA, the FBI, the NBA, the CFL, Fanshawe Security, the RCMP, Windows SP and the KKK.

It all began when five trillion dollars landed in my back yard in August of 2003. I herd allowed crash one morning and there it was, and unmanned craft bearing the markings of a country I am not autherized to name. Inside I found suitcases and suitcases and suitcases of $20 US bills!

I aslo found instructions to certain partys telling them that they sould distribute the five trillion American dollars into the American economy to cause speedy inflation in America, to destable the American economy so that America would have to withdraw from the American invitation of Iraq.

As you can imagine, I immediately called the Polygon and they said that they did not want any news of this getting in, to keep quiet and to do nothing with the funds. Natrually, I have complimented with this very serial command.

But what a difference a little sub-prime meltdown make! As you have heard the US governments has committed to bailing out banks and industries with trillions of dollars.

Of course, if they wanted they can simply print the money. Or! they could go to a source that already has the money ready to go! So, it makes perfect sense, you agree, that they call me back giving permission to spend all that money and inject it into the U. S. economy.

The banks and industries they had planning to bail out will receive instead something far better — millions and millions and millions of orders for consumerist items, which will result in a complete renujevation of the American economy. This and will result in the rapid stabality of the planet as things get back to normal.

You can be part of this amazing resortation of the global economy. I am prepared to share the five trillion dollars with four others.

If you contact me right away, I will have the BMO, CIBC, HSBC, ING delivery truck bring the money to the Fast Cash store that is closest to you at your convenience and with absolutely no delivery charge for the transaction upon receipt of your authorized instruction orders. This method of sending you the money is so secure that neither the CRA or any motorcycle gang will ever no about. I will also sent you a free t-shirt with the words, “Rich? If Only You New.” Got them at Valu Villlage!

Here is all you need to do. Email me the following: birthday; socially insurance number; drivers license information; bank account numbers and pins; credit card number with the extra three numbers on the back; mother's shoe size; hight and wait; cost of a litre of gas in Italy today (this last question is just to confirm that you are aware of how the globil economee works and that we are in the same sheet).

This might sound too good too be troo. However, I can assure you that it is.

Vichael Meenema is guest writing this week and Michael Veenema will be back next issue.
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