Summer Movie Preview

Having a hard time choosing what movie to see on a Friday night? Does Furry Vengeance, the recently released romp about woodland creatures wreaking havoc with a real estate developer's plans just not do it for you? Well fear not, as an obscene amount of money has been spent on producing and marketing a slew of films guaranteed to eat away at your bank account. Here is a look at some of this summer's most anticipated flicks. (Note, the Biz Booth in the Student Union Building will be selling discount tickets to some of these movies - only $2 for students. Check out the Toonie Tuesday and Children's Film Series dates listed below.)

Iron Man 2 (Released May 7) — Just like its predecessor in 2008, this sequel kicks off the summer movie season, and should benefit greatly by being the first one out of the gate. It looks big, loud and fun. It certainly helps that stars Robert Downey Jr. and Mickey Rourke have so much talent running through their veins... well, talent and residue Jack Daniels and cocaine, but mostly talent.

Robin Hood (Released May 14; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on May 18) — Russell Crowe reunites with his Gladiator and American Gangster director Ridley Scott in this take on the classic tale of Robin Hood, the legendary figure who stole from the rich, and gave to the poor. It's a story that's been told many times before, but Crowe always delivers so it should be a big hit. And if it's not, may God have mercy on anyone who crosses Crowe.

Shrek: The Final Chapter (Released May 21; available as a Children's Film Series selection on May 30) — They may never reach the quality of the original Shrek again, but I wish they would keep making these movies forever. If only to tie up Mike Myers and Eddie Murphy so they wouldn't have time to work on atrocities like The Love Guru and Norbit. This latest Shrek chapter, presented in 3-D promises to be the last in the series, although Puss in Boots headlines his own movie in 2011.

Sex in the City 2 (Released May 27; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on June 1) — I'm more than a little disappointed the film isn't going to be titled Sex Harder. All of the cast members from the show and original movie will be back, including Kim Cattrall and Seabiscuit… oh sorry, on closer inspection that is Sarah Jessica Parker. Men, if you plan on dragging your lady friends to The A-Team, then be prepared to enjoy the antics of Carrie Bradshaw and friends as they vacation in Dubai.

The A-TeamThe A-Team (Released June 11; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on June 15) — One of my childhood favourites gets resurrected on the big screen. Hopefully it will not be desecrated the same way Transformers was. Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper and UFC competitor Quinton “Rampage” Jackson star as Iraq war veterans who have been framed and are looking to clear their name. If the classic A-Team van, explosions galore and cameos from original stars Dirk Benedict and Dwight Schultz aren't enough to get men excited, they've thrown in Jessica Biel for good measure. This movie could be more effective than Viagra.

Toy Story 3 (Released June 18; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on June 22) — This one should be the biggest hit of the summer. Woody, Buzz, Mr. Potato Head and the gang face an uncertain future when their owner Andy moves away to attend college. The first two Toy Story films were revolutionary, and eleven years gone by since the last one, so anticipation should be sky high. The film is presented in 3-D. Shouldn't they have something new by now? 3-D is so early 2010. The people demand 4-D entertainment!

Grown Ups (Released June 25; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on June 29) — This Adam Sandler comedy should fall short of last year's Funny People in terms of quality, but it also should be more enjoyable then some of the crap he has unleashed upon the general public. Sandler is joined by Kevin James, David Spade, and surprise, surprise, Rob Schneider. If Sandler decides to go a year without making a movie, Schneider will be in line at a soup kitchen somewhere. Sandler and company play a group of former high school basketball players who get together for a weekend after their former coach passes away.

Twilight Saga: Eclipse (Released June 30; available as a Toonie Tuesday selection on July 6) — It seems that Twilight movies are released as often as the latest iPod model or celebrity sex tape. For those familiar with the series, this one sees Bella faced with the difficult choice between her love for Edward, and her friendship with Jacob, while some mysterious killings are taking place. For those not familiar with the series, a bunch of emo looking kids will be running around pretending to be vampires and werewolves.

The Expendables (Released August 19) — I'm not one for overhyping, so I'll simply say this will, with 100 per cent certainty, be the greatest movie of all-time. Sylvester Stallone wrote and directed this blockbuster about a team of mercenaries who are on a mission to overthrow a South American dictator. Stallone stars with Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, Mickey Rourke, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin and UFC legend Randy Couture. Plus there are appearances by Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger for good measure. There is so much testosterone in this movie that if you don't have a thick layer of chest hair within a week of watching it, you should ask for your money back!

Summer movies