B.A.L.L.S.: Misery on the bus
The bus ride
Before I get into it, let me list my top 10 things that irritate me about riding the bus (in no particular order):
1. Drivers who alternate between gunning it then jerking to a halt so that even if you're sitting you need to hang on.
2. Loud cell phone talkers.
3. Those advertisements above the windows that offer nothing to the betterment of humanity - unless you need more information on how to remove gum from your pubic hair.
4. Rolling bottles of water that scuttle around under the seats.
5. People who sit next to you when the bus is empty.
6. Buses with so much advertising on the sides that you cannot see out of the windows anymore.
7. People who don't move to the back on a busy bus.
8. People who wear enormous backpacks on a crowded bus and inadvertently smack you with their bag every time they shift around.
9. People who still smell like soap at the end of the day
10. Read below...
So I got on to the busy bus the other day, paid my ransom to endure 20 minutes of hot, stuffy, self-imposed torture, and tried to look cool as I progressed down the rubber mat hall. Suddenly, the bus decided to jerk forward. My façade of coolness turned into an embarrassed grasp at a metal bar and a dropped mitten. So now I'm not cool, I just want to sit and check my text messages like everybody else on the bus. Looking around through the live graveyard of bouncing zombies, I spotted an empty seat, but lo, it is not free, it is comfortably holding the beat up gym bag of some low-panted, slouching form working hard at adopting a movie gangster slang type of Yo-Yo-Yo ghetto persona, dreaming about last weekend hanging with his homies, sucking back 50's, rye shots and bottle tokes, wondering what to do with the $6 he had and refusing to watch Sesame Street because he "...already knows most of that stuff."
I caught his narrow, puffy eye (just one) and pointed to the seat. He hastily picked up his bag, allowing me to sit.
Now, I ask you: why did I have to ask for a seat? I think it is pretty obvious that the bus is full and that people are standing up. You can tell this because the bus is full and a lot of people are standing up.
My Take:
In an effort to hold on to something in one's life, some little bit of control in a society that looks down on you, one may take control of the immediate environment. This may garner some degree of satisfaction at causing unrest to those who are too intimidated to ask you to move your bag. You can at least harbor some satisfaction in the fact that you can influence people.
A neglected dog will often act to initiate the wrath of its owner. Better to receive negative attention than no attention at all.
Conclusion:
Well, here we are somewhere between dinosaurs and oblivion, we are just trying to survive as best we can, sometimes we only see what is in front of us, not what is really there. We should all be honored to share this time with each other, this little bit of history that will define our age. Are we the passengers on this bus ride? Or are we the drivers? Perhaps we are neither; maybe, just maybe, we are the beat up gym bag on the seat beside another.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
Before I get into it, let me list my top 10 things that irritate me about riding the bus (in no particular order):
1. Drivers who alternate between gunning it then jerking to a halt so that even if you're sitting you need to hang on.
2. Loud cell phone talkers.
3. Those advertisements above the windows that offer nothing to the betterment of humanity - unless you need more information on how to remove gum from your pubic hair.
4. Rolling bottles of water that scuttle around under the seats.
5. People who sit next to you when the bus is empty.
6. Buses with so much advertising on the sides that you cannot see out of the windows anymore.
7. People who don't move to the back on a busy bus.
8. People who wear enormous backpacks on a crowded bus and inadvertently smack you with their bag every time they shift around.
9. People who still smell like soap at the end of the day
10. Read below...
So I got on to the busy bus the other day, paid my ransom to endure 20 minutes of hot, stuffy, self-imposed torture, and tried to look cool as I progressed down the rubber mat hall. Suddenly, the bus decided to jerk forward. My façade of coolness turned into an embarrassed grasp at a metal bar and a dropped mitten. So now I'm not cool, I just want to sit and check my text messages like everybody else on the bus. Looking around through the live graveyard of bouncing zombies, I spotted an empty seat, but lo, it is not free, it is comfortably holding the beat up gym bag of some low-panted, slouching form working hard at adopting a movie gangster slang type of Yo-Yo-Yo ghetto persona, dreaming about last weekend hanging with his homies, sucking back 50's, rye shots and bottle tokes, wondering what to do with the $6 he had and refusing to watch Sesame Street because he "...already knows most of that stuff."
I caught his narrow, puffy eye (just one) and pointed to the seat. He hastily picked up his bag, allowing me to sit.
Now, I ask you: why did I have to ask for a seat? I think it is pretty obvious that the bus is full and that people are standing up. You can tell this because the bus is full and a lot of people are standing up.
My Take:
In an effort to hold on to something in one's life, some little bit of control in a society that looks down on you, one may take control of the immediate environment. This may garner some degree of satisfaction at causing unrest to those who are too intimidated to ask you to move your bag. You can at least harbor some satisfaction in the fact that you can influence people.
A neglected dog will often act to initiate the wrath of its owner. Better to receive negative attention than no attention at all.
Conclusion:
Well, here we are somewhere between dinosaurs and oblivion, we are just trying to survive as best we can, sometimes we only see what is in front of us, not what is really there. We should all be honored to share this time with each other, this little bit of history that will define our age. Are we the passengers on this bus ride? Or are we the drivers? Perhaps we are neither; maybe, just maybe, we are the beat up gym bag on the seat beside another.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.
