You ever really look at those magazines that are displayed at the checkout counters of grocery stores and pharmacies?

One would think that they place all of those magazines at the checkout to keep you occupied while waiting your turn in line. I believe it is much more sinister than that: there before you are a dozen images of skinny women, men with six-packs (I think I was up to a one-pack once), rich tinsel town couples, stunning cars and kids with plastic hair wearing cardigans and playing with a puppy on a white shag carpet. Along with these images are pronounced headlines spelling out messages like: "How to be a better lover," "25 top diet tips," "Easy abs in six weeks," "Get back in shape" and a picture of Prince William, on bent knees before fiancée Kate with a tear in his eye, with the headline, "I think I am gay."

These images and headlines are not there to inform us, or enlighten, enrich, encapsulate or entrance us - they are there to tell us that we suck! Portents of greater things in your life, if only you dare turn the pages herein and discover truths that we are willing to impart for $7.99.

Our status, our culture, our spiritualism, our sexuality and our health are based on consumerism, advertising and the corporate whim. It used to be religion, family, community and perhaps the occasional peek at the underwear section of the Sears catalogue!

According to Annie Leonard, who is a guru of sustainability concepts, we live in a society under siege. We are bombarded with over 3,000 corporate messages every day! Three thousand times a day we are told that we suck. Our clothes suck, our hair sucks, our cars, homes, children, job and pets suck. But there is a solution: shops. It seems that magazines are consumers' guides to fulfillment; the answer is just a page flip away. What we are being told is that our worth as a member of today's society is based around our consumerist habits.

Really, the magazines are not telling us anything we don't want to hear. Most of us probably want to be in better shape, or have a bigger house, better car, newer computer and better cooking skills, but here is the irony — we live in a society that not only glorifies fast food as a culture, but we are kept so busy that we don't have the time or motivation to cook or work out, thus making us fat. We live in a society where people find status and fulfillment in the procurement of material goods, thus making us broke and in debt. We now need two incomes to support a home. We are beat up every day worrying about money and jobs and relationships, thus making us unhappy.

The same arm of society that takes our pride and money and health, also offers escape, release, happiness and spiritual fulfillment.

We are the juggler's balls, frowning and smiling our way through the few short decades of our lives.

Of course there are magazines that finds motivation in health and growth, but you will be hard-pressed to find them at the checkout line. My contention is that these stores are playing with our heads, just as the distributors are playing with theirs, and the publishers theirs, and the marketers theirs. Who, I wonder, is tossing these damn balls around?

It would be a funny rack if all the magazines offered extensions of our current lifestyles: "Fat and loving it," "How to not walk your dog," "Squatting is cost-effective," "Five minutes is the new 30 in bed." I guess when it comes right down to it, we kind of do suck, but I sure hate being told it 3,001 times a day.
Editorial opinions or comments expressed in this online edition of Interrobang newspaper reflect the views of the writer and are not those of the Interrobang or the Fanshawe Student Union. The Interrobang is published weekly by the Fanshawe Student Union at 1001 Fanshawe College Blvd., P.O. Box 7005, London, Ontario, N5Y 5R6 and distributed through the Fanshawe College community. Letters to the editor are welcome. All letters are subject to editing and should be emailed. All letters must be accompanied by contact information. Letters can also be submitted online by clicking here.