Mourners decry nearby brothel, eerie noises
A newly opened Las Vegas brothel is coming under some heat from a nearby cemetery after mourners complained of constant noises filtering through the property. Some of the sounds, moaning in particular, spooked some children into thinking lost souls were roaming the cemetery grounds.
The owners of the brothel thought that they had picked the perfect location for their operation, an out of the way on the outskirts of town 1930's mansion.
“I'm shocked that mourners think they are hearing any sounds coming from our business,” said owner Rex Runder. “I'm a little upset that there is a suggestion that our ladies and the dearly departed should keep their distance.”
The mayor of Las Vegas says she wants legal brothels to be about 600 feet from a cemetery, She says there's a place for brothels and a place for cemeteries, and the two don't mix.
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.
The owners of the brothel thought that they had picked the perfect location for their operation, an out of the way on the outskirts of town 1930's mansion.
“I'm shocked that mourners think they are hearing any sounds coming from our business,” said owner Rex Runder. “I'm a little upset that there is a suggestion that our ladies and the dearly departed should keep their distance.”
The mayor of Las Vegas says she wants legal brothels to be about 600 feet from a cemetery, She says there's a place for brothels and a place for cemeteries, and the two don't mix.
Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is unintentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.
