Life moves quick in the world of Britney Spears. Just months after she announced her separation from Kevin Federline, Spears has apparently tied the knot again. This time with a local London, Ontario no-name hanger on looking to cash in on her fame and possibly release his own rap CD. Yes, it's London's own celeb wannabe Breckon Prest.

The ceremony took place this past weekend at Fanshawe College's swanky Forwell Hall with reverend MC Hammer, parachute pants and all, overseeing the church service. The ceremony attracted numerous celebrities to London including David Hasselhoff, Christina Aguilera (pronounced a gorilla), Stephen Colbert, Oprah, Chaka Khan, and Richard Simmons. When asked about the wedding Brittney said “it was the wedding of my dreams. Breck has it going on.”

The ceremony goers were buzzing trying to figure out how Spears could legally go from separation to a marriage within two months. We managed to catch up to the newlywed at the reception after the wedding was held at The Oasis where we asked her what her plans were for the future.

“I'm just going to take it easy before we start filming Crossroads 2, until then, I'm not leaving the bedroom”.

Las Vegas polls opened up wagering Monday on the duration of the marriage giving 3-1 that it doesn't last a year.

Disclaimer: Stories printed in the Fanshawe Distorter are in fact fictious. Any resemblance to persons real or dead is intentional and entirely hilarious. Proudly distorting the truth since 2005.